You and me
We used to be together
Everyday together
Always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know

Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

Our memories
Well, they can be inviting
But some are altogether
Mighty frightening
As we die, both you and I
With my head in my hands
I sit and cry

Leaves

Slippery when wet.

Trust me on that one.

November Rain

It's November. It's raining. And I've been listening to this Gus N' Roses song quite a bit lately.

When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain
We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain
But lovers always come and lovers always go
An no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away
If we could take the time to lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain

Do you need some time...on your own
Do you need some time...all alone
Everybody needs some time...on their own
Don't you know you need some time...all alone
I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you

Sometimes I need some time...on my
own Sometimes I need some time...all alone
Everybody needs some time...on their own
Don't you know you need some time...all alone

And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain, ohhh yeahhh
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain


Don't ya think that you need somebody
Don't ya think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

YouTube

I just uploaded a bunch of videos to youtube that should have been up a long long time ago.

http://www.youtube.com/user/alinerbeaner

You should check it out, you may just be on the internet without even knowing it...

Interesting

November is apparently Res Life's "Relationship Month", according to the e-mail I just received. I guess I won't be celebrating.

Question of the Day:

Who wants to give me a back massage?

Will YOU be the lucky one?

Alex, Ulrika, Los Angeles, and Disneyland

Yay! Home again, home again. Alex tonight. Alex tomorrow. Disneyland tomorrow. Ava's birthday the day after. Molly the day after? Relaxation, fun, sexxxx. Yumm. (That was for you Ulrika)


Meanwhile...I requested these friend details from William who's been ignoring me like a little bitch...

William was a real Acadec nerd, Aline was a closet nerd. The two developed their closest relationship online where they would talk to each other almost every day about anything and everything. Willy had a little crush on one of Aline's friends, a crush that might later ruin him and even possibly tear his friendship with Aline apart. When the two went off to college, things began to change. The tear-filled Willy at graduation became a drinking, partying William Carrillo who no longer wanted to associate with Aline. He didn't bother to contact her, he didn't answer her attempts to catch up via facebook or aim. He left Aline wondering, where is my Willy? Has he been infected by the pain we call love, the bitch with no sense of immorality...is he STILL not over the girl (if you can call her that) who never liked him and never will? Aline can only wait and hope that William has the decency to explain himself.

Don't you?

Don't you just love finding a plastic baggie full of pot under your table, blended in with the carpet?

I do. Too bad I can't keep it.

The Universe:

Would a doughnut-shaped planet ever work?

Just wondering.

Also, I just heard on the radio. "Every day counts, but only one day matters." What?

7 Deadly Sins

I found this interesting:

Catholic Punishments for each of the 7 Sins

Sin Punishment in Hell
Pride Broken on the Wheel
Envy Placed in freezing water
Wrath Dismembered Alive
Sloth Thrown in Snake Pits
Greed Put in pots of boiling oil
Gluttony Forced to eat rats, toads, and snakes
Lust Smothered in Fire and Brimstone

I heart wikipedia for giving me this knowledge. And I'm very thankful that I've never been guilty of any of these sins. There's nothing like being thrown into a snake pit to change a person.

Casting Call, woop wooop!

Another major motion picture will be filmed at Reed College on
Saturday, October 7. The movie is titled "Into the Wild," and is
based on the best-seller written by Jon Krakauer. The film is a story
about "The young, idealistic Christopher McCandles who abandoned life
as most of us know it for the Alaskan wilderness." "Into the Wild" is
directed by Sean Penn, and stars Emile Hirsch, William Hurt, and
Marcia Gay Harden, all of whom will be on campus. Filming will take
place on the front lawn in front of Eliot hall, the Eliot driveway,
and the canyon foot bridge.

There will be an extras casting call for
all Reed students, staff, faculty, alumni and neighbors this Sunday,
October 1, from 1 - 6 p.m. in Vollum Lounge. They are filming a
commencement scene, and need 600 people. They are looking for adults,
age 18 and older, to work as paid extras. Please bring a photograph
of yourself (non-returnable). $75 for 10 hours, overtime after 10
hours. No experience necessary.

I think I should do it. After all, the best actresses are from LA...(are they?)

Phew

All is well in the realm of KC. Thank Allah.

In other news, I've successfully divided a 1 lb. bag of skittles (arranged by color, of course) and put them into an Izze bottle so that they resemble that tacky colored sand art that you make at festivals. It's beautiful, I must admit, but every time I want a skittle and I tip the bottle a little to get it, the colors mix a bit. Rats.

Also, I should be doing my english paper. I'm on the end of page 4 out of 6 and I literally have NOTHING more to say. And that is why I am blogging instead of brainstorming. Really, I think that there is absolutely nothing out there that could contribute to the quality of my paper on this stupid excerpt. Blah. Heeelp. If you want to finish it for me, that would be great.

P.S. I have another post named Phew. I wonder what it was about.

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

The last couple days, on my walk to and from school, I've been very aware of a certain caterpillar. The first time I saw it, I was impressed that it could be so furry and plump and amazing. It was black and brown and amazingly fuzzy. So fuzzy that it almost appeared to be a lump of fuzz, not even a living creature. But it was definitely a caterpillar, and I admired it for being so fuzzy and conspicuous among the sharp grass and rough pebbles along the pathway. After seeing this caterpillar for the first time, there hasn't been one time that I've been able to walk to or from school without seeing it. It somehow mysteriously catches my eye every single time. Even this afternoon on my way back to my apartment, I saw it. But this time, it wasn't its usual fuzzy self. I walked up to it only to find it brutally murdered- ripped apart by an evil, ignorant human. If only it was a worm and could stay alive after such trauma! But no, the delicate caterpillar is ruined. Grieve with me.

More than...

More than skittles,
more than Johnny Depp,
more than old school No Doubt,
more than cornichons and goddess dressing and watermelon,
more than ice cream,
more than Reed,
more than reading great fiction,
more than finding that perfect warm spot in bed,
more than children,
more than the ocean,
more than Disneyland (ok, MUCH more than Disneyland),
more than the Breakfast Club and Empire Records,
more than wikipedia,
more than pink,
more than anything and anyone else I know,

Once again, how much I love Alex.

-------ndjfkghketadfagadrnbvioearw--------

FUUUUUUUCK.

phone temporarily (i hope) lost. fuck fuck fuck fuck. don't like this.

call me?

can't sleep, need phone. need boy. not ignoring anyone. dehydrated but too lazy to go upstairs. too weak. sink water? no.

smells like cigarettes? it's me? no cloves left?

sooooo many places to look, no car. walk to holgate/59th? walk to rager? walk to 39th/ellis? party #1, #2, #3, the first or second time at #1 and #3? pool hall? mcdonalds? not ray's car. not my purse. not my pants. where oh where? aaaaahhhhh.

cans rattling outside, why so early? going crazy. talking in fragments. thinking in fragments. why?

fucking cell phone dependence.

I've been a pretty horrible person. I made him cry. I'm relentless and selfish. Selfishly relentless. Relentlessly selfish. I accused him of taking advantage of an old rich woman who doesn't know better, which may even be partially true, but I never wanted him to cry. I don't want him to be sad; I don't want to hurt him. But of course, once again, insensitive Aline is a bitch. I can't seem to stop fucking up. And now I can't even talk to him because he's on his way to the LBC to party with Ulrika et al.

Godammit, I love him. I'd do anything to make him happy. Just look at him.



He's just too wonderful and innocent and beautiful to be sad.

Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1-5, I am very in touch with my princess side.

This is all because of the most adorable girls in the world, Samantha (3)

and Tessa (5)


They're scrumptious, I know. You should see them in person.

Dinner with the Cush

My hum conference from last year has developed rather strangely. We started off as a normal hum conference, bringing up intriguing passages and thoughts for each text we analyzed. And then, we bonded in a way most hum conferences don't. Eddie Cushman was certainly the glue. There are many different sides of the Cush. The first Cushman that we saw, giving the same stuttering spiel to prospies every time as they sat in our class "Hi, my name's Ed, or Eddie Cushman. I teach primarily in the philosophy department...". I'm sure we can all recite it perfectly. Then there's the kid Eddie, who says something amusing and blushes as the whole room laughs. He tries to be badass, but comes off as harmless and cute. There's athletic Eddie, super aggressive and super hyped. Then there's the image of Eddie, the rockstar image. With his boots and tight pants, his leather jacket, you can't get more hardcore than that. I know there are many more Eddies; feel free to add.

So, as I was saying, our conference was invited to his house last night for dinner, dessert and music on his prided soundsystem.
It was not at all awkward- we all got along great and the food was delicious.

While there, it was revealed that Eddie's on youtube. In a Renn Fayre clip, you can see him running down the field at about 30 seconds. It wasn't as impressive as I thought it might be, but you can still tell it's him. Here it is:



But even more importantly, here's Eddie:


My favorite moments of the night had to include Eddie admitting that he frequently hides from Reedies when he sees them outside of Reed and that a good Cuban cigar is like a whip-it.

A Lewis and Clark Party

Honestly, we shouldn't have been surprised. With an endeavor like this, we were set up for failure. When we arrived, we were told of the circumstances. Beer pong downstairs. Beer pong upstairs. And that's it. We walked inside, only to find some guys playing beer pong surrounded by some drunk dancing girls. The whole scene was remniscent of high school. So we walked upstairs, smoked a spliff and went on to the better Reed party. I did, however, get a clip of a drunken huddle before we left the LC party. Think what you will: